Thursday, February 22, 2007

Thursday Thirteen - Final Installment!

Thirteen Ways To Survive A Horror Flick:

1. After you manage to kill the monster/killer, never sit beside it and cry. It will suddenly pop back up to finish the job.

2. If you are a woman, never strip and take a shower in slow motion.

3. If you sense something is behind you, don’t bother turning around to check. Just run.

4. Never go to camp or become a counselor. You’ll be dead by the end of summer.

5. Avoid people with pale complexions who sway and moan.

6. If the young girls of the neighborhood start singing songs about boogeymen while jumping rope, consider moving.

7. If you hear a strange noise coming from upstairs that sounds similar to, oh let’s say a severed head falling to the floor, don’t go trying to find out what it is.

8. If you are a girl with long blonde hair, blue eyes and big boobs, well, you are pretty much screwed.

9. Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, even as a joke.

10. If appliances start operating by themselves, move out.

11. If you find a town which looks deserted, it’s probably for a good reason. Take the hint and stay away.

12. When you are searching a house because you think there is something dangerous there, turn on the damn lights!

13. When running away from the killer/monster, NEVER run upstairs.

26 comments, add yours here:

Raggedy said...

LOL! I loved your Thirteen!
Thursday Thirteen has come to an end.
I have enjoyed my visits here and consider us friends.
Thank you for sharing your thirteens with me.
The comments you left me filled me with glee.
It is hard to believe it is really true.
I am trying very hard to not be blue.
Happy TT'ing!
(")_ (")Š

Rashenbo said...

Fantastic list!!! :) I Love the line about the blonde and boobs :D

And, the crying next to the monster... they do that way too often. :)

Thank you for giving me a chuckle!

Thursday Thirteen has been fun and I'm sorry to see it go.

Take Care

Abigail S said...

1) That's why you always need to chop the guys head off- he's not coming back after that!

8) Screwed in what way?!

12) I never understand why they don't do that! Seems like a no-brainer to me!

Great Thirteen!

Julia said...

OMG - I can agree with your list more. These are the things I always wonder why it happen on horror flick LOL

Since this is the last TTs, I want to wish you happiness and good luck. Happy last day TTs to you!

Heather in Beautiful British Columbia said...

That was hilarious - especially the appliances running by themselves. My coffee grinder does that occasionally - YIKES!!! I'm moving...

Dayngr said...

Very helpful! Sounds like something I posted along the same lines. We should combine them together! Things I learned from watching horror movies

More things I learned from watching horror movies

Travis said...

I'm finding good safety tips everywhere I go tonight. This is a great list!

katherine. said...

I loved this list... I have a couple people I want to send it to...

Robin said...

I'm too much of a scaredy-cat to ever watch horror movies, but that was hysterical!

Kimo & Sabi said...

Also, don't hang out wif da chicks who wear halter tops, wif short-shorts, and high heels - them always gets it!

Chris said...

Sound advice :-D

Skittles said...

Ohhh that's a great TT and so very true!!!! I didn't do one this week and now I find out it's going to be over?

el-e-e said...

I like the one about little girls sing-songing in your neighborhood. :) HA!! Yeah, might want to move away.

Twisted Cinderella said...

This was too much fun! Prince Charming would love this list too. Thanks for making me smile today. it was nice meeting you through TT, I am sorry to see it go.

totallyun-pc said...

I like to pretend I'm brave... but remember "the others" where the old lady in the wardrobe bursts into Nicole Kidman's dream? I was the only one in the cinema who shrieked.... much laughter followed, i'm still not allowed to forget it to this day.... Grrrr

Really entertaining blog this ... will be back! x

Rebecca said...

Number 7 totally cracked me up. How about this one, "If you are running from a killer...try not to fall down...if you do, get up quickly and don't lay there and squirm and scream. Get up and run. Idiot"

Rebecca said...

PS Have I missed something about this being the last TT??? What's that about? Am I in blog world la-la land?

Rebecca said...

PS Have I missed something about this being the last TT??? What's that about? Am I in blog world la-la land?

Maggie said...

LOL. and never never look back. They always look back.

Great list. I laughed

GreenEyedGirl said...

Great list! #8 is great!

Kai said...

Oh those are priceless! I always scream at the TV when #1 happens - "no don't turn around - shoot him some more!!"

Great list!

susan said...

These are good tips since I hardly ever see horror movies so this way if Jason or whoever is in my house I'll know what to do! thanks!!! Great TT :)

Laughing Muse said...

Yep. And: don't ever go upstairs. Don't ever go downstairs. In fact, don't go inside any room where there are less than five living people...and don't go into any room where there are not at least three quick and easy means of escape.


Yay, for the horror cliche!

~*Kelli*~ said...

8. If you are a girl with long blonde hair, blue eyes and big boobs, well, you are pretty much screwed.

My FAVORITE, although they all cracked me up! Good job!

Di said...

And to add the 24 quality to your list, don't even fantasize about having sex with Jack Bauer...because if you do, you'll never make it to the end of the season!

Nancy said...

LOL! These are great. And, I put them in my mental file under Survival Tips!