Who Said Being a Mom Was Gonna Be Easy?!
The older my children get, the more I realize how different each of them are. The oldest is 8 years old and she is so creative and crafty. She is a very imaginative thinker. She is stylish and fun and such a great little singer. She is a whiz in school, in fact she loves school. She used to be very shy and timid, but has really come out of her shell in the last couple of years and has some really great friends. Learning comes easy to her, with a few exceptions. She has always done very well in school and never really had to study because for the most part doing the work in class was enough to get her by.
The middle child, our only son was just barely five when he started Kindergarten this year. He was very reluctant to go even though he went to daycare/pre-school for 3 years before he started school! He cried for over an hour on the first day of school. I had to walk him to class every day for the first semester. The only things he really likes about school are P.E., lunch, and recess! He used to ask me every day what activity he had and on the days when I told him he had library he would cry and say he didn't want to go to school until it was P.E. day. He is such a boy. He loves to play rough (fight), run, etc. He has a very hard time sitting still. He thrives on structure. He is energetic, fun, and so very loving. He is a true "cowboy" at heart. He loves the outdoors and his favorite past time is horseback riding.
My point in this post is that they are all different. We cannot discipline them all the same because their needs are differently. We cannot compare them academically, socially, or emotionally because they are so different. This is something that I struggle with, especially with the older two who are attending the same Elementary school. They are not on the same level academically and they most likely never will be. The oldest started school later because her birthday falls in November. The middle child was only a few days shy of the cut off for Kindergarten so it seemed like we just cut the cord and sent him to school. With every decision I've made with him this year, I wonder is it the right one. Sometimes I look for that instruction manual that will tell me each step I need to make but, it has yet to be found. It's probably under that big pile of laundry! Needless to say, the middle child's first year of school has been vastly different than the oldest. Enjoyable at times, but at others (like today) at the end of the day I am just left with a sigh wondering if we've made the right decisions as parents. Only time will tell...
7 comments, add yours here:
Just wondering if you are making the right choices shows you are a very caring mother in my book.
Thanks, MM! Being a parent is by far the hardest job I have ever had. There's just such an investment!! But with the grace of God and his infinite wisdom, Brien and I can conquer anything...even this child raising stuff!!! ;)
There are so many times I have wondered if I am doing the right thing, doing enough, doing it right. ((hugs)) for what it's worth, I think you are a fabulous mom with three great kids. (My kids are all very different from each other too)
This is my first blog that I am commenting on. One of the things that brought me to continue reading was the personalization of your blog. I think that every great mom, questions every move they make. My son is eight and my daughter is 22 months. They are so different!
TC: As a mom, I think the worry never stops. But, it is so worth it with all of the perks that come with raising kids...like hugs and kisses! :)
Heather: Thanks so much for stopping by! Hope to see ya back.
Although I am a twin---my sister and I could not be more different. However--because we were the same age and going through the same things at the same time---my parents always treated us equally and the same. I am sure they had all good intentions--and many people would think that is what should have been done. The thing is--- we were and are very different people-- but our grades, looks, behaviors, possessions were always compared and manipulated to be even. As we got older and started making our own choices, things were not always even and fair--it was an adjustment to try to accept and deal with that after a lifetime of fairness and equity. We did not know any different. Now I have two girls of my own--14 months apart, only a year apart in school. I find myself trying to make everything equal and fair for them. I find myself comparing them. I catch myself and try, try ,try to let things happen naturally and accept their differences, and let them see that things are not always equal and fair. It is hard, but I think they will be better adults for that.
Rose - THANK YOU so much for that comment! I can relate, my sister and I are 18 months apart and we were constantly compared when we were in school. She was compared to me as she was younger and we do look a lot alike (people often thought we were twins) our personalities are very different. Raising kids is definitely trial by error, but thankfully we can use some of our parents mistakes as well as good decisions to make our own! :)
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