Wednesday, February 11, 2009

One Family's Loss and Another's Gain, or is it?

Being a mother of three children, there are a couple of news headlines that have really made me uneasy. The first one being the Casey Anthony story. This one caught my attention because this sweet little girl was born on the same day as my son, Tyler - August 9, 2005. It just breaks my heart how this family has gone through the agony that they have been through over the last 6 months. The remains of sweet Caylee who was only 2 at the time of her disappearance were found only miles from her grandmother's house in Orlando, Florida. She had been placed in a laundry hamper bag and then secured in a garbage sack before being tossed out in the woods as if she didn't even matter. To make matters worse, her mouth was covered with duct tape containing a heart shaped sticker. I've spent hours listening to Casey Anthony, the mother of this sweet little girl toy with detectives lying about where she worked, people she associated with and more. Caylee had been missing for 5 weeks before it was reported to the police, and only then it was reported by her Grandmother.Casey claims to have left Caylee with a babysitter who never existed at a vacant apartment building. The inconsistencies in her story just go on and on. You can hear 911 calls, see a time line of events, and see the actual police reports and case at Investigation Discovery. I truly believe this woman is guilty. She is hiding something with lies and in the end the truth will prevail. In the meantime, her parents held a public memorial for Caylee in which she did not request to attend. She is in jail, a place in which this mother of three hopes that she spends the rest of her life!


And then there is the story of Nadya Suleman. Many of you might not know her by her name, but you might recognize her for the accomplishment of having a set of octuplets. WOW! That is what I thought when I heard this story. Those parents will have their hands full. Then I heard that there were already six children in this family. YIKES! So, now they were left to raise 14 children. WOAH! Then I learned that this woman has no stable relationship, she is a SINGLE mother. She receives food stamps and disability for three of her six children. She also lives with her mother in a two bedroom house. I do not think that there is anything wrong with receiving government assistance, or living with your parents if the situation arises, BUT for this woman to become impregnated when she doesn't have the means to support the six children that she already has is not only ludicrous it's also selfish. I do not think that this woman should be allowed to keep her children. I think that this doctor should've taken a step back before allowing this to happen. There should have been some red flags flown VERY HIGH at him to prevent him from performing this procedure. I don't know what the laws are in this situation, but if there were not laws broken on his part, I do believe that they should be put into place so that it cannot happen again! I think that this woman is in the business of having children, literally. I think that she wanted to get pregnant to get money either from people who feel sorry for her situation or to live free so that the hard working citizens of this country can pay her way. Either way, I find it disgusting and selfish!

So, do you want to weigh in on these subjects? How do you feel about these two moms? What about the children involved in this story? Am I just harshly judging because I am a mom myself?

32 comments, add yours here:

Pami said...

I sooo believe she is Guilty and I hope she gets hers in the end I wish the whole truth would come out, I really feel sorry for George the Grandfather you can see the pain in his eyes and I believe he knows nothing except for the fact he knows his daughter is Guilty, poor guy he even tried to commit suicide so sad little Caylee had her whole life ahead of her.


and that other mother is nuts how and why if you already had six kids you could not afford would you go to all that trouble and end up in the end with 14 kids and who is going to pay for all their needs WE the taxpayers.

katherine. said...

the death of Caylee Anthony was heartbreaking. I think the evidence points to her mother...and if that is proved I think she should be put to death.

On the other...

The decisions made over the course of many years which resulted in the fourteen Suleman children were very ill advised. Wrong even. Should not have happened.

The hang up is how do you make laws to govern this type of technology?

Do you make legal restrictions on how many assisted pregnancies but not on how often a woman can get pregnant naturally?

Financially....how much do you have to make to freeze embryos? Once you have frozen embryos how much do you have to make to implant them? And since the cost of living in your town is different than my town do they calculate by zip code? What if the parent is laid off...what happens to those embryos? Should rich people have a greater right than poor people to have assistance having children?

She is a single woman. Should they forbid single women from assisted pregnancies but not single women from getting pregnant naturally? And what about people in committed same sex partnerships? Do they have different laws than an unmarried heterosexual woman?

I watched the hour long interview with her last night. Not that it makes it more acceptable, but she was aiming for one more...not eight more. Apparently she had six embryos implanted with each time before. Four times she had a single birth, one time she had twins...and a few times none resulted in pregnancy.

I just don't know how we can make laws about this kind of thing. Once we have laws for people getting assisted pregnancies...someone will come along and make laws for natural pregnancies.

Desert Songbird said...

I don't think Casey Anthony will ever divulge the full truth as to what happened with her daughter. I think she is incapable for whatever reason of telling the truth, and she has a inability to feel emotional attachment. Does this excuse her behavior? Absolutely not, and I believe she should be punished for her role in the death of her daughter if is proven she was responsible (which I believe she is). Does this mean she should be given sentencing recommendation because of attachment deficit? Absolutely not. But it is a sad truth that parents like Casey Anthony exist and will continue to do abhorrent things to their children. Can these tragedies be prevented? Only with diligence by those who know the perpetrators. And that's the difficult part.

About the Suleman woman, I think the fact that her own mother has given up assisting her in the raising of all those children is telling. For her own sake, Nadya's mother has decided to let her daughter finally fully live with the consequences of her actions. Time will tell how successful this woman will be as a parent.

But, personally? I think she should be spayed.

LAC said...

I agree with you on both counts. I think its absurd for that woman to be allowed to keep 14 children. There are so many other deserving families out there that CANNOT have children. If she wants to be in the business of kids, she should have been a surrogate and give the gift to others who deserve the children more.

They will both get their just "reward" on the last day.

Mom Knows Everything said...

The first mother needs to spend the rest of her life rotting in jail. The second one...was she artificially impregnantated???

Anonymous said...

Sad, isn't it?

I think the whole Anthony family is hiding something. Just my suspicion.

As for the woman with the "Angelina Jolie syndrome" I feel for the kids. They will end up paying the price for mom's mistakes.

Unknown said...

I've heard a lot about the Casey Anthony case and it's just so so sad. How could a mother hurt a beautiful daughter like Casey?

Sarge Charlie said...

bothe mothers are nuts.........

carol g said...

I agree with you Sarge... there is no doubt in my mind that Casey Anthony is guilty. It is going to be damn difficult to find a jury for her trial even if they change the venue.

As for Suleman... well, being a resident of California, I guess I will be helping to pay for her being an total idiot. Our governing body can't agree on a budget to get us out of our financail woes right now... but we will pay for the hospital bills and everything else that is going along with this fiasco. Can I mention that our state treasury is sending out IOU's for state income tax refunds? Suleman says she is going back to school to become a counselor. Tell me, please, with the notarity of this story, who is going to use her services - what agency would hire her?? She is not only KNUTS, she is also delusional (or is that considered part of being KNUTS?).

carol g said...

One more thing, then I will get off my soap box... All 14 of the Suleman children should be put up for adoption... separation of siblings is not necessarily a good thing, but is it better to keep things as they are? Being adopted by loving, caring people who can afford the luxury of a child does not mean that all ties must be broken with their siblings. It just means that they will probably have a much better life.

Heart of Rachel said...

This is the first time I've heard about Caylee's story. My heart goes out to her. I hope that justice will prevail for her sake.

Sandee said...

For the first mom, I pray the courts will do their job.

For the second mom, she's in it for the money. That's what I think anyway. If you look at past multiple births these families got new homes, money, and were basically taken care of during the raising of the babies. I think that is what she is looking for. I'm not thinking she's going to do very well though.

Have a terrific day Tisha. Big hug. :)

Kristin said...

To tell you the truth, her having 14 kids on govt. assistance is no different than the women around my area who pop out a kid a year so they can up their cash/Link money. It's people like her that make it hard for someone who actually NEEDS the money to get the help. My friend is pregnant right now, her boyfriend is working but his checks are going to bills they still can't pay. She has been trying to get Link since she got pregnant and they won't give it to her. For reasons unknown, because she qualifies. Women who have children just for the govt. assistance should be sterilized.

Anonymous said...

I have largely managed to avoid the Caylee story, because it breaks my heart too much to hear about it. I believe there is a special place in hell for her mother, and I'm glad there are laws in place to make sure her time left here won't be much better.

As for Nadya Suleman, well truth be told, I'm a little obsessed with this story. It also physically causes me pain, but only for those 14 innocent children. There is no law or regulation that says she did anything wrong, yet 14 kids are going to be caught up in her selfish need to "connect."

I also know there are lots of kids already here, who have lost their families for one reason or another and are stuck in a child welfare system. I wish that those who desire a house full of children would consider that before taking drastic measures to conceive their own. When does it end?

http://foreverfamily.today.com

Mom Knows Everything said...

I have a tag for you here.
http://www.momknowseverything.com/2009/02/photo-meme.html

Unknown said...

I agree with everything you have said about both moms.

visiting from entrecard.

Not So Anonymous Michelle said...

I completely agree with you on both counts, as a mother and just as a human being, it sickens me to think of what that poor little girl went through and by the hands of her own mother (I believe she's guilty)! It's sick and so sad and I really hope justice prevails!

I think there is something seriously wrong on many levels of that 14 baby mama!!

Patois42 said...

I'm afraid we have to put up with people who abuse their freedoms in order for all of us to have it. I'm talking of course, about the mother of 14. (The Anthony woman will get her own here and beyond.) I don't want the government to judge who can and cannot have children. It's heartbreaking for the kids, but I truly don't see another way.

Sandra Carvalho said...

Ohh my Goodness...I believe that neither of the two are qualified to be moms...The first one, well...In my opinion she should get the same faith of her baby girl...And the second one should have an hysterectomy....You prob heard about Maddie McCann case so you know how I feel about this sort of crimes...
xoxo

Akelamalu said...

I think the doctor who agreed that Nadya Suleman was eligible for IVF treatment when she already had six children should be struck off!

Jillie Bean (AKA Bubba's Sis) said...

I think of all the women out there who so desperately want a child and can not have one - and here we have one mother who threw hers away, and another mother who has so many she should have to share!

Both women are crazy. Both situations are sad for the children.

Barb said...

God has a special place in Heaven for children like Caylee Anthony. I do believe her mother killed her, which positively boggles my mind. I cannot imagine a mother taking the life of her own child.

The moment I heard the octuplets story I said to my mother, that doctor needs to be scrutinized.

I was in fertility off and on for 15 years. My doctor made it clear to me from the beginning that he always was shooting for a single embryo as that was all the human body was designed to carry. No hyper-stimulating of the ovaries to produce a bunch of embryos.

I did get pregnant a few times with singletons, but miscarried or had tubal pregnancies. My point is - it is completely possible to just have one when you have a reputable doctor.

Linda said...

Amen, sister, on both of these! I hear that the State of California, which is beyond broke like so much of the rest of the country, is left footing the bill for the "miracle" octuplets. If that's the case, then I think perhaps they need to go to homes where they can be well taken care of. That woman, IMHO, has a screw loose - a very large screw!

maryt/theteach said...

Tisha, it's beyond me to understand Nadya Suleman's motivations for having more children... It's just crazy!!

BTW my "Looking at the Sky on Friday" is up! :)

Anonymous said...

I agree with you on both situations, but on the 2nd one: People have babies everyday from money. Either through giving their baby up for adoption (paying for a child is illegal) or adoption through DFACS *JUST* so you can get a check every month. SAD

Becca said...

I saw the octuplets mom has a site up now for people to "donate" to her. It just makes me sicker and sicker.

Anonymous said...

I can't even begin to put into words my thoughts and feeling about Ms. Anthony.

Ms. Suleman on the other hand is just plain nuts. I can't imagine that she is doing this for anything other than money. I love my daughter but I would not have wanted 8 of her at once. And what kind of doctor does this, certainly not a responsible one, apparently he is as interested in the almighty dollar as she is.

Amazing Gracie said...

The Anthony case is tragic. I feel so badly for the grandparents and her brother. She's a psychopath - no conscience.
The Suleman case really troubles me.
The doctor needs to be either censored or have his license to practice revoked. I think child welfare authorities should keep their eyes on the children - but I don't want the government stepping in either. How in the heck she plans on managing them without a staff is ludicrous!
From what I understand, she received a settlement in the six figures and is how she paid for all of the treatments (and apparently her botoxed lips!) The doctor should've had her checked out by a psychiatrist before he ever agreed to do this. He's in it for the money - obviously!
I don't care how many she thought would "take," she never should've been allowed this in the first place.
Sorry - I have such mixed emotions.

Anonymous said...

2 very strange cases, and each are very sad. There is no way that woman can take care of 14 kids, especially if some of the newborns have disabilities

Don Wood said...

God bless Caylee and an eye for an eye to her Mum if she is Guilty

Jackie said...

I agree 100% with you, Tish. On both of the mothers. The first one woman doesn't deserve the title of "mother". More like MONSTER. I hope she rots away in jail where she belongs.

The octomom is nothing but selfish, money-hungry Jon and Kate wannabee. LOL. Seriously.... and without a "Jon" no less! I can't stand hearing her interviews..... she's bogus and fake. There's just no "sincerity" in her demeanor. She's all about the $$$ and nothing else. Those poor babies.

Anonymous said...

Tish as you know I Do not yet have the privilege of having sweet babies yet but I love them so so much and can't wait to have them some day! I agree 100% with you!! ANTHONY- Search engine's for "death, how to make chloroform, and neck breaking" were found on her computer!! The same duct tape, trash bags, and heart shaped stickers that were found at the crime scene were also found in her home!! And there was evidence of a decomposing body in the trunk of her car! HOW MUCH MORE EVIDENCE DO U NEED?!? I don't think the jury has a heart!!! I know that sweet baby is with the great Lord and savior but she deserved way better then sh got! SULEMAN- this women see's the duggers and how they got their tv show and thinks she can get the same thing... She is completely selfish and I absolutely can't stand ppl like tht! She obviously is doin this for attention and dosnt care that all these poor kids have to live like they are... I would never bring that many children into this world especially knowing I couldn't give them what they needed! I feel very strongly about these subjects and I think I should have been the juror for this because I would have gave that sweet baby justice!! - chelsey dodson