Monday, April 09, 2007

Question

When, I mean at what age is it appropriate to tell your children about death? How do you explain to a four year old that her puppy got out of the gate and into the road and was hit by a passing car?

Do you remember your first experience dealing with death and explaining it to your children? How did you touch on this fragile subject? What age did this occur?

I'll post more on this subject later. I'm just too drained emotionally to talk about it right now. It was a rough night...

9 comments, add yours here:

Rebecca said...

I had a dog get run over when I was 4 and I think I'm still a little scarred by it! :( Around the same time both my uncle and grandfather died...so I think I just accepted it that it was a sucky thing. I think honesty about it is important...you're allowed to say it sucks rather than saying it'll be fine.

Kara said...

I'm sorry (((hugs))) We haven't had to talk about that with our kids yet so I don't have any advice.

Turnbaby said...

Aw i am so sorry. I grew up on a farm and i don't really remember a time when i didn't know about the 'cycle of life' I remember being sad about it but i also understood the good side--the renewal side. Don't have any real advice sugar--so sorry about the puppy.

Heart of Rachel said...

My first realization about death was when I was about 9 years old when my Uncle died. I attended his funeral and it was such a sad moment for everyone.

My 3-yr old son doesn't fully understand about death but I told him that our dog Miko went to Heaven and was never coming back. It made him a little upset but I just told him that Miko was happy and he didn't have to worry about him.

I don't know how to explain it to him further and I'm glad he let the subject drop.

I hope the others can be of better help. Hope everything will work out for the best.

AMAZING GRACIE said...

If your kids go to church and have a concept of Heaven, Rachel's idea is pretty good. The concept of death is usually best prepared for by a beloved pet but two is still pretty young to get the idea. I'm so sorry for you all.
~~~Blessings~~~

Josh said...

OMG... Golly, sorry... that must be tough. I'm not looking forward to having that conversation with my daughter.

Travis said...

I'm so sorry about your little dog. I lost a dog this way too. It's so tough to explain, and even worse when it's so sudden.

Stine said...

Are we ever old enough??? My (then) youngest was nearly 3 when my grandmother died. We had all been very close, and she'd been sick, so the disappearing act didn't seem right, somehow. She was taken to see her, and that was ok, but she was very angry that they had let her greatgran go outside in the cold... She touched her icy cheek... And she was also adamant that she should have been allowed to bring her spade to the funeral. The priest had one, but that wasn't much good...(ashes to ashes...) My point is - they will grasp as much of the concept as they are able to, and shouldn't be left out. My husband's kids, aged 4 and five asked, upon having a litter of puppies: are we going to slaughter them, too? They bred turkeys and chickens, and knew that animals=food...
You did well!

Skittles said...

My heart goes out to all of you :(