Thursday, September 21, 2006

For The First Time

Yesterday, on the way home from preschool my daughter told me that she and her friends played like they were smoking on the playground. She said they picked up sticks and pretended they were cigarettes and she smoked. I told her that smoking was gross and nasty and it made you stink and she should never, ever smoke. I also told her not to pretend to smoke either, cause it was silly and sticks are dirty and you don't need to put them to your mouth. What if a bug pooped on it? She said, "But mom everyone else was doing it!!"

Right then and there, I froze...I knew the words that were about to come out of my mouth. The words you hear YOUR parents say and think...that is the stupidest thing that I have ever heard in my life...HERE GOES:

Well, Shelby if your friends all jumped off a bridge would you do it to?

She told me that she would not, but she wanted to be "cool". I told her how uncool smoking was. I don't smoke and I'm cool (I know at this point my three year old who is acting like a teenager is thinking WHATEVER).

Mom...you weren't stupid all those years like I thought you were!!!

I began to think about all of the pressures that are placed on our children to try to be "cool". It isn't enough that they have to dress cool, have cool things, etc. But, to try to fit in by smoking, doing drugs, acting out. It is a scary thing. I know that fake smoking is only the begining of my "battles" with my daughter...and I don't even want to THINK about my son. He's already so rebellious that I am scared to death as to what he'll be like when he gets older...for now, I'll enjoy the fact that she is play smoking with sticks and he just wants to climb on top of things. We'll tackle that other stuff when we get to it. : (

9 comments, add yours here:

David said...

The old bridge come back huh? I always thought that was dumb too when I was growing up, but I use it all the time now. I talk to my 13, almost 14 year old all the time. About boys, about smoking about cussing about calling people names. I have talked to her LOTS of times about smoking. She thinks it is gross too. I told her if your friends say you aren't cool because you don't smoke, tell them they will look really cool on oxygen machines. It is tough, you should hear my "boy" talks. She thinks they are hilarious :)

HeatherinBeautifulBritishColumbia said...

Wow - great writing! Enjoy the next 20 or so years - my kids are 32 and 25 and I can tell you they do become normal human beings sometime? in their 20's! Life with kids is always a challenge :) but worth every minute. BTW "Who Are We" just directed me here!

The Bizarre Jokester said...

that was a nice post!
but you know, there are many battles you'll have to face while bringing up your children. i'm just a 16 yr old kid, and the bridge example has been used countless times on me (though more times by my teacher than my parents :) ), and in the end, these sorts of examples do work

so best of luck!

Jessie said...

Visiting from the carnival and I have to say this post cracks me up. I remember the first time my mom said those words to me. And the many times they were repeated.

Kiyotoe said...

that question used to always get me, whenever mom asked it. And she'd always get frustrated by my responses.....

"uuhhh....do they live after they jump?"

"is it over the ocean or is it land?"

"can I have a parachute?"

which of course opened up a whole new can of worms. Great post, thanks for sharing.

NoMas said...

Thanks for sharing! Funny how kids will do the darnest things.

Chris said...

Life goes in circles doesn't it? Everything you did to your poor parents comes around again....

:-)

Bobby Griffin said...

Hey, just stopping by from the carnival...thanks a bunch for participating...I hope you will again in the future!

Sanni said...

Thanks for sharing this great post on the Carnival!
May your 2007 be filled with happiness and blessings galore =)