Fwds
I got this in a forwarded e-mail today. NOT fromDavid, though. He knows better. *LOL* Refering to his blog about not fwding e-mails "not since a certain someone sent me this really REALLY nasty email chewing my ass out for forwarding her everything in my email box."
Anyhow, I thought it was cute so instead of fwding it, I'm posting it here. Hey, if you don't like it don't look at it!!!
Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered
assassinated instead of just murdered?
Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny
for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were
buried in for eternity?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
What disease did cured ham actually have?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be
a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up
like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see
you naked anyway.
Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible
crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut,
why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't
point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're
both dogs!
If Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why
didn't he just buy dinner?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same
tune?
Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but
call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at
you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the
window?
Do you ever wonder why you read my blog in the first place?
2 comments, add yours here:
I am going to start sending you EVERYTHING I get from now on. Even those anoying junk mail ads. :)
Don't even think about it. I'll have Renee whip your ass, beotch!! : )
*Hmmm...now that I think about that, you'd probably like that! Nevermind...just don't even think about it!!*
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